Beer:- Comes in 60cl bottles, cost ranges from about N160 (60p) – N300 (£1.20) a bottle. On hearing I was coming to a state with Sharia law I thought drinking would be limited to the occasional overpriced hotel bar. I am happy to report that beer is available just about everywhere in Kaduna, and most of the time it’s even cold. Near every bar there will also be a suya vendor, who sells barbequed meat covered in pepe (dried hot pepper) for N100 a pop. Mmmm beer and meat.
Star (5.1%) – Budweiser’s less charismatic younger brother, contains at least 25% headache. The drink most volunteers start on.
Harp (5.15%) – Made by Guinness Nigeria, surprisingly not a bad larger and now firmly part of my evening schedule. Currently runs a promotion where you can win the occasional free beer. Being Nigeria the bottle caps have to be taken to a secret location between the hours of 10-4 on a Tuesday for possible redemption on payment of a dash. The ABV is quoted to 2 decimal places, I think this is simply a cunning marketing ploy to make it seem like it’s brewed to an exacting standard....
Gulder (5.1%)– brewed in the continental style by amstel, this is beer you have to chew. No volunteer I know drinks the stuff.
Guinness (7.5%)– Nigeria is apparently the 3rd biggest consumer of Guinness in the world. The story goes that when Guinness first wanted to launch a brewery in Nigeria they invited local breweries to submit their attempts at copying the iconic drink. After rejecting the entire first batch as universally dreadful they sent those tendering for the contract a case each of the original from Dublin to show them what they should be aiming for. The winner of the contract simply steamed off the Guinness labels and affixed his own to the bottles and returned them to the UK for consideration. Once winning the contact he continued to produce his original drink. If you want to get an idea of what this stuff tastes like, buy a bottle of Supermalt (or other malt based drink) then add 4 shots of vodka and one shot of lighter fuel. It’s sweet, strong and (in my opinion) completely unfit for human consumption.
Malt drinks: These are really popular in Nigeria, and come in numerous varieties all canned to look like beer. I find them sickly sweet and about 2 sips provides my entire years worth of maltyness. Worryingly the longer you stay here the more likely it seems that you will start to like the stuff. Also they are considered the “king of minerals” and “honoured guests” are always offered these in preference to coke/fanta/something i might want.
Minerals: This is the Nigerian name for any fizzy drink, Coke, fanta, mountain dew, occasionally diet coke etc. Come in 35cl glass bottles (N40 for the drink plus N10 deposit for the bottle), must always be drunk through a straw (not sure why but people look at you very strangely if you drink from the bottle). These provide the cheapest way of getting a safe midday drink. My teeth are taking a real pasting, and I’m sure I will need more fillings when I get back.
Pure Water:
This is a clever idea in principle. Its water in a plastic bag, rather than an expensive plastic bottle. A bag of pure water normally costs N5 (2.5p) and can be bought anywhere. The problem comes in Nigerians attitude to waste management/littering and the left over plastic bags cover just about everywhere, all roadsides, drains and riversides. Any possible scenic view will be ruined by the remnants of these bags, which I suppose is another reason why Nigeria doesn’t really have a tourist industry. The water in them seems safe enough, but to get into them you have to bite the corner off, exposing you to just about every disease under the sun.
Tap water:
Cholerary. No idea where it comes from, boil for 10 mins, filter, hold nose, hope for best.
This week I have also had a bash at making a solar oven, but at the moment it’s in test form and I’ll write some more about it another time.
Coming soon – Nigerian cuisine!
hmmm.... I give Nigeria a 6/10 diabetic death rating...
ReplyDeleteNot sure we really know what you actually do on an average day - if indeed there is such a thing...? Are you actually hiding somewhere in Slough for the year?
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ReplyDeleteI'd prefer Nigeria the SLOUGH!!!
ReplyDeleteMatt Forbes (you'd like him Rich) and I once nailed two Nigerian Guinness before a gig... don't remember the rest apart from the aftertase!